Ash didn’t like any of the demo material i played him. Well, it’s not even that he didn’t really like it, he just really didn’t seem bothered by it.

Which hurts really. Cause Lukey and me spent a lot of time working on it.

Oh well… there’s more important things to worry about, as JJ’s off to university soon. Must be nice being smart lol. We’re going to need a new drummer I guess. Still got to talk to him about it, as nothing’s actually been said about it by anyone. Threequartersmile really are a bit scattered at the moment… I can’t wait for luke and india to get home.

I have been so lonely, I hadn’t noticed up until today.

I just wanna get out, and gig. I miss the feeling of being one of a bunch of nervous 16 year olds, setting up with the bare minimum on a tiny stage, and playing badly and loving every fucking second of it. Just riding the waves man.

For this reason, I’m gonna start playing acoustic nights again. It scares the shit out of me, cause you never know how you’ll do, I’ve played some corkers and some stinkers – ranging from a stranger shouting from the bar for me to play something with a bit more kick, to another stranger coming up to me and shaking my hand and reciting a line from one of my songs. Facing a group of strangers and belting out the contents of your heart… It scares the shit out of me, and I love it. India doesn’t understand why I don’t like roller coasters and rides, but I’m an adrenaline junkie in my own weird way

Loneliness drives me to do things like that, hehe.  But also, seeing myself in the same way I did at the beginning of the year, when I was all ready to give up on my band and join another – I’ve wasted far too much of my life. Seeing a picture from exactly five years ago drove it home, that not a lot has changed. Sure, the people have, and the skills have grown and branched out, but I haven’t actually done much with it, and if shitty, chords-by-numbers indie acts from all over the country but with the same haircut can receive such high recognition in the music scene, why can’t a few honest songs with a bit of soul?

Some happy news to end on though – I contacted former members of the band, a chosen family from another lifetime, to seek permission to use old recordings online, and everyone replied with a resounding ‘yes’ it seems

So you’ll soon start to see mp3’s up for download from this blog. It’ll be released as a podcast also… so there’s no excuse for missing any Granted, my vocals back when we were starting out was a massive massive let down to the rest of the sound, but it’s interesting to see how the original first EP fits in to the bigger musical picture. A look at the tree’s roots you could say. The Everyone’s Alibi EP will be included, as will Life On Rails EP, interspersed with tracks from Thirdperson and the album we started recording in 2005 when everything fell to shit, there’ll also be the best pick of the live recordings, all manner of acoustic and electric demo’s, and orphaned songs that never made it to a CD.

I think i’ll kick it off with the Apart EP though, to give people an idea of where I was musically as of december last year.

Ben Dlugocecki owes me £50. If he doesn’t give me my 50 CD’s or my money back, then I’ll write a song called ‘Ben Dlugocecki owes me £50′ and release it as a charity single hehe!

anyway, me out of here, catch ya later peeps

Love xXx